Crime Survivors Guide

A Message from Rose Preston

Founder of Crime Survivors NOLA

First of all, my deepest condolences to you, for I know you are in the depths of grief and feel like your world has shattered to bits. 

Homicide affected my life: on September 3, 2003, my husband and his mother were brutally murdered by a tenant who was about to be evicted for not having paid rent for a year. I was in another country at the time, and a phone call awoke me in the early hours of the morning. I was asked if I was sitting down. My heart and mind raced: whatever the news was, it was bad. James and Patrina (my husband and his mother), the woman (a relative) said, were both dead. The logical part of my brain said: they’ve been in a car accident. But the woman went on to say: “I’m sorry to tell you they were murdered.” 

At that moment I was spun into a surreal space. I remember thinking I was in a nightmare where an unreal agony had possessed me. In those first days I felt like an egg that had broken, hopelessly scrambled in every respect. I would go from sobbing uncontrollably to being in a daze of disbelief, and soon an agonized fury came into the mix. The grief was complicated because I was not only mourning the sudden death of my loved ones, but also the traumatic way in which they had died from unimaginable violence. I have friends who had the pain of not knowing who had killed their loved one, others where a body was never recovered, others where the rapist was never caught, and others where attackers were not convicted. 

This guidebook is the outcome of my experience. Especially in those initial days and weeks, everything was so overwhelming. There was so much I had to deal with that I couldn’t have imagined. I found it hard to remember information. Cloaked in a depression that felt bottomless, I had no energy. At the same time, I was seething with rage and a desire for justice. Pursuing justice, I was to find out, was a long and drawn-out business. It took time, but I started to piece together how the police, prosecution, and court system worked, finding helpful officials along the way. I slowly found out about various resources, including things that helped to relieve some pressure of this heartbreaking pain. I also realized that if I was struggling to piece together this information, then most likely others would also be at a loss to comprehend the flow of the justice system or where to go for help – so I decided to write the book I wanted to read. This is the second edition of the guidebook. 

Just before the case was to go to trial, the killer died of medical complications. I felt furious and cheated – I had wanted to see him ‘go down by law,’ and now he was dead. The killer’s wife had been indicted as an accessory after the fact (she had lied to the police and hidden evidence), and so attention now turned to her. Then Hurricane Katrina happened and the evidence room was flooded. The District Attorney’s office told me I needed to do a plea bargain with her because the case was now so weak. I ended up negotiating this with the wife’s attorney. I had heard of restorative justice (or victim-offender dialog), and wanted this to be a part of the plea. This was agreed to, and some of it was accomplished, and I learned information that would probably never have come to light in a trial. But because the process is voluntary, I could not force the killer’s wife to continue when she decided to stop. Nonetheless, it was a helpful journey that allowed me to ask questions that had haunted me. 

I have battled to come to terms with this new reality, what people sometimes call the ‘new normal,’ because nothing is ever the same again. There is a stigma that sometimes sticks when murder or traumatic violence is part of your story. I quickly learned to discriminate between those hungry for sensationalism and those who had genuine compassion. There were other issues: I sought out oblivion, increasingly in alcohol and drugs, and became an insomniac (not sleeping), deeply depressed and suicidal. But through professional counseling, getting medical help, attending grief groups, and with guidance from people and groups who had experience and empathy for my situation, I was able to make a gradual adaptation. (See Resources for listings at the end of this book) 

I know there is no completion date to grieving, and I will never forget my loved ones; there is no ‘closure’ that I often hear spoken of. As time passes, my feelings have shifted to more of the good memories than sadness, but a core of pain remains, and waves of emotion still overcome me, especially on anniversaries or if I hear or see something related to them. But I also embrace healing and joy where possible. 

My hope is that you find the strength and courage to be a voice for yourself, for your loved one(s), and that you seek and are given the support you need for your adjustment to this new stage, your ‘new normal.’ 

Warmly, 

Rose


FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS (FAQ)

While every effort has been made to provide accurate information, your case will have its own particulars, and some procedures may change.

This guide is intended to assist survivors of violent crime in understanding the confusing and sometimes overwhelming events that typically occur after such a crime; however, it is not intended to provide legal advice.

You should always consult with licensed professionals as well as the officials involved with your case. You can request information from higher in the chain of command (at whatever agency you are dealing with) when appropriate.

While we must use formal legal terms to describe various official processes, we try to use inclusive language wherever possible.

HOW TO USE

This Guide is for survivors of violent crime in Greater New Orleans. This may include those who have experienced: 

  • Family and friends of a homicide victim 

  • Rape / Sexual assault / Domestic violence*

  • Child or elder abuse

  • Robbery / Theft / Burglary

  • Aggravated assault or battery

  • Hate crimes 

  • School or campus crimes

  • Mass violence incidents

Some words are bolded for emphasis.

I've included some of my personal experiences in italics so you can decide if you want to read or skip them.

*Domestic violence and sexual assault survivors are encouraged to contact the following local organizations for immediate assistance:

  • NOFJC (New Orleans Family Justice Center), which provides wrap-around services from police through to District Attorney assistance, plus counseling and related issues.

  • STAR (Sexual Trauma Awareness & Response), which provides advocacy, counseling, and legal services.

  • See additional listings in Resources


Start at our Types of Violence Section HERE

For basic information and resources specific to your experience.


The rest of our guide includes 3 main sections:

01.

The issues and needs of the survivor: immediate practical concerns, initial crime services, civil legal issues, and mental health matters.

02.

How the criminal legal process works: from the police investigation through to an arrest, dealing with the District Attorney’s office, and going to Criminal Court if the case goes to trial. State and federal victim rights are listed.

There is a flowchart at the beginning of the section.

03.

A glossary explains legal terms.

The resources pages list information for: Law enforcement; Legal aid clinics; Community groups; Medical health clinics; Mental health services, and Grief groups.


While every effort has been made to provide accurate information, your case will have its own particulars, and some procedures may change. 

  • This guide is intended to assist survivors of violent crime in understanding the confusing and sometimes overwhelming events that typically occur after such a crime; however, it is not intended to provide legal advice. 

  • You should always consult with licensed professionals as well as the officials involved with your case. You can request information from higher in the chain of command when appropriate. 

A helpful tip to locate material you're looking for is to use the search button at the top right of the screen.


SAFE BROWSING & PRIVACY

Exit From This Website Quickly

Source: National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV). Linked from": Exit From This Website Quickly — Safety Net Project (techsafety.org)

Many websites that have information about domestic violence, sexual assault, or stalking have a “quick escape” or “leave this website” button at the top of their webpages. Some websites have a pop-up message to let you know that you should leave that website if your device is being monitored. These buttons or messages are there to allow someone to quickly leave the website if she or he is concerned that it could be an issue should someone know that they are seeking this kind of information.

This button is helpful only if someone is watching over your shoulder or enters a room and you need to quickly switch to another website. It will not prevent the other person from going through your browser history or from knowing you were on that website if they are monitoring your device or internet activity remotely.

To minimize the chances of someone knowing that you are researching information about domestic violence, sexual assault, or stalking, follow these tips.

  1. If you think your devices or internet search activities are being monitored, access this information from a device that isn’t being monitored. That should be a device that the person do not or has not had physical or remote access. This is the safest thing to do if you don’t want someone to know that you are visiting these websites.

  2. Sign out of other accounts, such as Google or Facebook, before visiting these sites.

  3. Use your internet browser settings to increase your privacy, such as turning off browsing history or using the browser in-private mode. Read more about browser settings here.

  4. If it is safe to do so, delete the websites URLs that you don't want stored from the browser history.

  5. Use a Virtual Private Network (VPN) to increase the security of your internet browsing and activity. 

Wondering if your devices are being monitored? Learn more about computer spyware.  

Additional Tips

Source: Louisiana Foundation Against Sexual Assault (LAFASA)


As you surf the internet, the browser you use will automatically save information about your activities. Common browsers are Google, Microsoft Edge, Mozilla Firefox, and Safari. Your browser history includes any website you visit or searches entered in your search bar. It is crucial for you to clear your browser history as soon as it is safe, if you don’t want anyone to know you have accessed this website or any other related sites.

Google Chrome:
Click on the three grey lines in the top right corner of your window, then click History.
Click the Clear browsing data button at the top of the screen.
Change the option at the top to a time you think is appropriate (the beginning of time might look suspicious).
Tick all the boxes then click the Clear browsing data button at the bottom and close the History tab.

Microsoft Edge:
Click Tools menu and select Internet Options.
In the General Options tab under the Browsing History section, tick the box that says Delete browsing history on exit.
Then click the Delete button next to the tick box, tick all the boxes and click delete at the bottom.
Click on the Content tab at the top, click the Settings button under Autocomplete and click the Delete AutoComplete history button.

Mozilla Firefox:
Click on Tools and then Options.
Click the Clear button next to Cache and Saved Form Information.

Safari:
Click on Safari in the top right corner of your screen.
Select Clear History and Website Data
You can then change the option to a time you think is appropriate (the beginning of time might look suspicious).

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External links to other websites outside of the crimesurvivorsnola.org domain are provided for convenience and informational purposes only. Crime Survivors NOLA has no responsibility for the accuracy of the content on external sites or the opinions expressed on them. External sites also have various privacy and tracking policies which may collect certain data about your visit, so be sure to check external sites’ individual privacy policies for more information.